Scorpions, you have crossed the line
Guess what I found in a box of clothes in the baby's room yesterday. A $50 bill! No, kidding. It's not that kind of house. Any guesses what I actually found, about three feet away from the baby's crib? Yeah. A scorpion.
For new readers or hopelessly optimistic longtime readers, I should clarify that, unfortunately, I am not referring here to the glamrock band who rocked us all like a hurricane with their 1984 album Love at First Sting. As terrible as that would be, I'm talking about the real, pincer- and stinger-having, hiding-in-shoes, getting-wrapped-up-in-sheets-at-night arachnids.
I mentioned here that I strongly prefer that my bedroom be a scorpion-free zone. I have been, you might say, "distressed" about seeing scorpions in my bathroom and bedroom. But when I see them in my baby's room, right by her crib, it's time to get medieval on some scorpion a**. The exterminators are coming next week, and I want them to be tearing down walls and ripping up foundation and just dumping chemicals everywhere.
Meanwhile, my husband and I have become a sort of scorpion factoid clearing house, with coworkers and friends and blog readers regaling us with their favorite scorpion trivia and offering tales of being stung. Every time I learn something new about these things it gets worse. For example, my husband was telling his assistant that one of the ones we saw wasn't all that big, which was refreshing. The assistant pointed out that that was most likely a baby, which means they're hatching in our house.
Also, well-meaning people keep trying to reassure me by telling me things that only serve to horrify me further. One popular tidbit is that scorpion stings are no worse than wasp stings. I AM TERRIFIED OF WASPS, so this information is not helpful. My mom told me that scorpions fluoresce under blacklight, so I should get one to try to find them at night. Umm...does the thought of turning off all the lights in my house and using a blacklight to illuminate a bunch of GLOWING SCORPIONS IN MY HOUSE not sound just a little too mind-bogglingly creepy to think about?! And, as I type this, I am on the phone with my dad who is telling me the story about how my grandfather (who lives a few miles from here) got one wrapped up in his pajamas while he slept. But, my dad assured me, he only got stung a few times and it really wasn't any worse than a wasp sting. Whew!
On the bright side, I have discovered an incredibly effective way to get your mother to insist on paying for the best pest control service in town to come to the house and give you their Platinum Package. When going out to dinner with your husband and leaving the kids with her, just say this, as I did last night:
I promise that one day I will resume regular content and stop writing about scorpions. Although that may require setting up a separate Scorpions in My House blog since I cannot seem to stop talking about it.
For new readers or hopelessly optimistic longtime readers, I should clarify that, unfortunately, I am not referring here to the glamrock band who rocked us all like a hurricane with their 1984 album Love at First Sting. As terrible as that would be, I'm talking about the real, pincer- and stinger-having, hiding-in-shoes, getting-wrapped-up-in-sheets-at-night arachnids.
I mentioned here that I strongly prefer that my bedroom be a scorpion-free zone. I have been, you might say, "distressed" about seeing scorpions in my bathroom and bedroom. But when I see them in my baby's room, right by her crib, it's time to get medieval on some scorpion a**. The exterminators are coming next week, and I want them to be tearing down walls and ripping up foundation and just dumping chemicals everywhere.
Meanwhile, my husband and I have become a sort of scorpion factoid clearing house, with coworkers and friends and blog readers regaling us with their favorite scorpion trivia and offering tales of being stung. Every time I learn something new about these things it gets worse. For example, my husband was telling his assistant that one of the ones we saw wasn't all that big, which was refreshing. The assistant pointed out that that was most likely a baby, which means they're hatching in our house.
Also, well-meaning people keep trying to reassure me by telling me things that only serve to horrify me further. One popular tidbit is that scorpion stings are no worse than wasp stings. I AM TERRIFIED OF WASPS, so this information is not helpful. My mom told me that scorpions fluoresce under blacklight, so I should get one to try to find them at night. Umm...does the thought of turning off all the lights in my house and using a blacklight to illuminate a bunch of GLOWING SCORPIONS IN MY HOUSE not sound just a little too mind-bogglingly creepy to think about?! And, as I type this, I am on the phone with my dad who is telling me the story about how my grandfather (who lives a few miles from here) got one wrapped up in his pajamas while he slept. But, my dad assured me, he only got stung a few times and it really wasn't any worse than a wasp sting. Whew!
On the bright side, I have discovered an incredibly effective way to get your mother to insist on paying for the best pest control service in town to come to the house and give you their Platinum Package. When going out to dinner with your husband and leaving the kids with her, just say this, as I did last night:
"I left clean diapers and jammies in the bathroom for after bath. The baby has already eaten but DB still needs dinner. Hmm...am I forgetting anything? Oh, yeah, be sure to check the baby's crib for scorpions before you put her in. Thanks! We'll be back in a couple hours."
I promise that one day I will resume regular content and stop writing about scorpions. Although that may require setting up a separate Scorpions in My House blog since I cannot seem to stop talking about it.
posted by Jennifer at
4:00 PM
9 Comments:
Now I thought I was right to be worried about the white tail spiders in our house but f'n scorpions - everywhere!! I would be moving out until you have Hiroshima'd the place. Like now, pack your bags (being wary of lurking scorpions) and leave now!!
No, no, we understand about the blog obsession! I'm sure that in Maslow's hierarchy of needs "need to keep house clear of scorpions for own safety and sanity" is considered much more fundamental than somewhere "help women across America achieve enlightenment."
lolol that is what I call horrific comedy
Wow. I think I'd die if I found one of them in my house.
AHH Thank You for being the first person to make me feel like I am NOT over reacting. I just moved to the suburban Phoenix area two months ago. In the last month I have found FIVE scorpions in my house! The last one on my bedroom wall at 1am! The managers of the complex keep saying "it is only like a bee sting" but I read online that bark scorpions (the ones in my house!!) can be deadly if you are allergic, and how am I supposed to know if I am allergic if I never have been stung? I was paniced but dealing... until I found the one in the bedroom. Now I am scared to sleep because I keep thinking/... How many are crawling around my bedroom while I am asleep???
Hello and thank you so much for leaving a comment on my blog site! I came to visit yours and found your scorpion story--so familiar to me since I lived for a while in Texas. Scorpions in the closet, in the drawers, on the ceilings! Two scorpion bites, both on my hand, one from reaching into a pile of linen, one from brushing off a scorpion in the night. My daughter was born in Texas, and we had to put netting over the crib and jars of water under the crib legs. That was so long ago, but your story brought it all back! Actually, it was a good time in my life--well, except for scorpions!
Oh, how scary. I would die if I seen a scorpion in our house.
I would have laughed when I read your post but it just isn't funny if you have experienced a scorpion in your house as I have. My husband was on the toilet and a 3 inch black scorpion came walking out from the base of the toilet between his feet. He immediately called to me for help, I grabbed a slipper and chased it down (it was running for dear life as it sensed the danger I think) and crushed it with the heel of the shoe. The next night another one came sauntering out of the bathrooom. The only thing we can figure is that they were crawling up the pipes and into the house on the second story. We live in the California redwoods, and we found out much to our surprise that there are scorpions living in the redwoods. Those were the only scorpions we have seen in the house, and that was about 5 months ago. I do not know how to treat a scorpion sting, but I do know about bee sting treatment. I would hazard a guess that the allergic reaction would be similar, the symptoms of a severe reaction include hives, generalized itching, generalized swelling, low blood pressure and difficulty breathing.
Call and ambulance if any of these symptoms appear after a bite or sting. Julie
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